Lessons Learned in Salt Lake City

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Lately I have seen the Lord blessing me with the remembrance that He loves me and knows me personally. I struggle with the fact that I am not married. I want to have a family so much. He knows this, and he has placed little blessing in my life here and there to remind me that things are done in his timing. He wants me to be happy with my life now, as it is and to be grateful for the blessing I do have. I have become aware of this desire for me in the last few days and want to write down so of the ways he has made this known to me. I hope to add to this as I continue to find this as my answer and hopefully I will learn to be happy in the now and stop waiting for what may never come in this life. J

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Sister Kristen Oaks, CES Fireside, September 11, 2011

Sister Oaks is the wife of Elder Dallin H. Oaks of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles. She was not married until she was in her fifties. She joined her husband in speaking at this CES Fireside and her talk was very important to me. She talked about how she was the poster child for single adults because of her many years as one. She had some great insights. I will just type what notes I took from that meeting.

~First she quoted a talk by Sister Margaret D. Nadauld about women the world needs and included men into it as well. Here is the quote: “The world has enough women who are tough; we need women who are tender. There are enough women who are coarse; we need women who are kind. There are enough women who are rude; we need women who are refined. We have enough women of fame and fortune; we need more women of faith. We have enough greed; we need more goodness. We have enough vanity; we need more virtue. We have enough popularity; we need more purity.” I love this quote. It is something I need to work on being more of what the world needs.

Then she made some a number of points:

1. The Lord loves us, answers our prayers, delights to bless those who keep the commandments…IN HIS TIME~

~Everyday it is important! Be your best!

~Worry less about marriage, and more about becoming a disciple of Christ.

2. Not saved in isolation

~life is not just about ME

3. Become best disciple of Christ I can be!

~If you cannot handle single life, you will not be able to handle married life

4. Learn to Recognize the Holy Ghost

~Don’t allow waiting for marriage to waste your time. Go Forward!

5. Remain Active Member of the Church

~We are not alone, the Lord is with us!

~Wow! I needed this talk so badly! I worry too much. I need to be happy with my circumstances/situation~

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FORGET NOT

President Uchtdorf

Forget Not!

1) Forget not to be patient with yourself

a. God knows you and I are not perfect and he also know that the people you THINK are perfect are not, yet we spend so much time comparing our weakness to others strengths. We make expectations for ourselves that are impossible to meet and we forget to celebrate our good efforts. Everyone has strengths and everyone has weakness.

b. Part of mortal experience that you have weaknesses

c. God wants to help us turn our weakness into strengths but knows this is a LONG process. And one day we will be perfect.

d. Keep working at improving, but quit punishing yourself for not being perfect! Please be compassionate and patient with yourself

e. Be thankful for all the small successes in your life. These successes may be tiny to you and may go unnoticed by others but God notices and they are not small to him!

2) Forget not the difference between a good sacrifice and a foolish sacrifice

a. Am I committing my time and energy to the things that matter most?

b. Sacrifice something good for something far greater in an eternal prospective

3) Forget not to be happy now!

a. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

b. We desperately long to find the golden ticket and we forget the simple joy we used to find in the candy bar. IF it doesn’t contain a golden ticket then the candy bar is a disappointment.

c. We should have righteous yearnings. The problem is when we put our happiness on hold waiting for a future event.

d. Never stop hoping, but don’t close your eyes to the simple and elegance of each days blessings. The happiest people are those who pursue worthy goals but love and enjoy the everyday blessings. They sew thread by thread.

4) Forget not the why of the gospel

a. Sometimes we see the gospel as a long list of tasks.

b. The gospel is not an obligation

c. It’s the pathway towards peace in this life and glory in the life to come from our Heavenly Father.

5) Forget not that the Lord loves you.

a. “As a child, when I would look at the little forget-me-nots, I sometimes felt a little like that flower—small and insignificant. I wondered if I would be forgotten by my family or by my Heavenly Father. Years later I can look back on that young boy with tenderness and compassion. And I do know now—I was never forgotten. And I know something else: as an Apostle of our Master, Jesus Christ, I proclaim with all the certainty and conviction of my heart—neither are you! You are not forgotten.”

b. No matter how dark your days may seem or insignificant you may feel or how overshadowed you may feel, he has not forgotten! You and known and remembered by the most powerful, majestic, glorious being in the UNIVERSE!

c. He loves you because you are his child even though you may feel lonely and make mistakes. Allow his love into your life and it can heal and dress any wound or hurt and soften any sorrow. You are closer to heaven then you suppose!

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I had a really neat experience this past week that continues to prove to me that the Lord is very aware of me and that He knows and loves me so much. I got a new assignment in the Conference Center or work cleaning mostly offices. As I clean I notice all the family pictures and wedding pictures and it has made me a little depressed that I don’t have my pw n family or husband. It made me question Heavenly Father and ask him why I am still single. The next day I went to my classes and I was sitting in my keyboarding class. My teacher was going over instructing us about typing and right in the middle of the instruction she stopped. She looked at us and said she didn’t know why she was going to say this but that she felt someone in the room needed to hear it. She said…you are loved. Your Father in Heaven loves you and knows what you are going through day by day. She said…sometimes life doesn’t go the way that you expected. She had expected to have gotten married when she was in her 20s. She didn’t get married until she was 40. Heavenly Father has a plan for us and we may not always understand it but it is perfect and he loves us. This was a tender mercy to me. She didn’t have to stop her instruction to say that. She could have just ignored the impressions that she was having, but she chose to stop, even risking us not finishing all that we needed, in order to say that because she felt that it needed to be said. It was for me! Heavenly Father knew I was wondering why and he used my sweet teacher to remind me that He is so mindful of me. He loves me so much. He knows I want to be married and have a family, but he also knows that I need to learn some things and that his timing is perfect. I am so grateful for this experience. What a blessing!

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